I wish I had more free time to spend actively journaling about my life and spiritual process but honestly, I don't consider it time wasted by LIVING my life to the absolute fullest.
Im a busy woman.
I'm a full-time+ science major college student (I am Pre-Pharmacy school working on my Bachelors in Biochemistry) my school load is NOT easy stuff.
I'm a mother of a very active and thriving 7 year old boy who is my total world.
I'm a wife to my husband of a near decade (even if we have only been legally married for 6 years) and I love him and spending time with him and going on adventures dearly.
I'm a girlfriend to my boyfriend of nearly 4 years (I'm polyamorous) and that means I also make time to accommodate that relationship with someone who is also physically active. Many adventures of mine include both men and my son. Sometimes not. But it always takes effort to balance schedules and time.
I have been a very active member of my local grove and this year decided to take a step back from leadership roles because quite honestly, it was taking away too much of my free time and actually hindering my spiritual process. I was burning out and too far involved with the politics of a Druid religion. I was losing sight of what being a Druid meant to me. I was stressed out with a zillion grove meetings and events, and crushing homework and test deadlines, partners that wanted my attention, a son who's school functions I couldn't attend and dozens of friends who were upset that they had not seen me in months.
My Faith had interrupted my life in both good AND bad ways and I needed to fix that.
My grove has many strong members who are able to offer more time and energy freely than I am capable of doing while maintaining my sanity and I don't regret my decision in any way.
I have grown much more because of this. I can still maintain regular public practice and involvement but not at the sacrifice of my own spiritual understanding and growth. Ive begun doing solo rituals, solo devotions, solo meditations and finding personal ways to connect with my Druidic path. I've used my free time (what little there is) to go on hikes and adventures, to draw nature, to research my deities and find creative ways to honor them, to throw myself deeper into a couple grove aspects instead of spreading myself thin by trying to do everything.
This blog gets often neglected because I am busy LIVING my druidic life. I've incorporated my spirituality into my already busy life and it just flows effortlessly now.
While It may be about 10 more weeks until my summer break when I will have months of time for myself to play Dedicant assignment catchup, please know that its not laziness that keeps me from updating, it is genuine fullness.
Life is about balance, and if there is one thing I've learned recently it's that you don't waste precious moments trying to capture a photo of a sunset and never being able to fully capture it. You put the phone down and FEEL the sunset, you enjoy it in its natural beauty fully aware that no photo will ever capture how its beauty makes you feel right now.
Right now, I am taking those precious moments to "experience" because my time is limited.