Week 10: Second High Day Recap

*Condensed for submission* 

This ritual was a challenge for me as I was on crutches and/or knee cart but it did not distract me from being fully involved in all aspects of this ritual. I knew what to expect in terms of invocations and such as I wrote them, but they became something powerful when I spoke my own words around so many people. I lead my first ever meditation in a group setting and while I don't feel very confident in it I know that I will only get better. I am a member of our newly formed choral Bardic group and this was the first organized Bard performance and I felt it went quite well. I also learned how to make a floral crown with fresh flowers for the first time! 

I watched my first Maypole dance and it was the most amazing experience, I could not preform as my foot was in a cast but the energy was high all the same. What started as chaos developed into genuine merriment and it was such a warming feeling to me. Happiness is an emotion I am sensitive too and it just resonated around that Maypole. If that pole could glow from all the laughter sent up those ribbons it would certainly have been visible to the Gods above.
Our Beltane honored the Sidhe and I imagined them dancing with us around the maypole and delighting in our display of merriment. So many elements of this ritual clicked for me and reminded me that I do this because I love it, because it brings out the happiest part of me; the part that celebrates warmth and love and laughter and community. 
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*Original Free-Write*

I have no idea how I am going to condense these into about 150-250 words but I am calling that future Spider's issue. 

Before I get into my recap, I think it is important to explain something. My second ritual since starting the DP program was our Grove's (Columbia Protogrove) Spring equinox ritual. This ritual was Hillaria of the Roman hearth culture and as I don't feel a particular draw to the Roman hearth it was a new learning experience for me. I wrote our grove's invocation to Apollo for inspiration and I really enjoyed looking into the God. I will probably start posting the invocations I write for Columbia Protogrove in my Dedicant Journal. I even constructed a gown, a contemporary style sea foam green toga that fit both the Roman aesthetic and springtime. I was super excited furthermore as my husband was co-leading his first ritual ever. 
However, less than 24 hours before the ritual I had a freak accident and broke my foot. A trip to the doctor revealed that I would need surgery and with a ritual 2 hours after I put on my first walking boot, there was just no way I could make it. That entire day I was bummed, I cried from the pain of my foot but I also mourned that I would be missing the first ritual with Columbia Protogrove in over 6 months. But thats life, and I needed to heal. 

I would be in a cast for Columbia Protogrove's next ritual, Beltaine but more importantly, I was co-leading it. I was incredibly nervous to begin with. With School, Family life, my temporary handicap, and the responsibility of writing large parts of the ritual itself, it was a truly powerful experience. I helped with the logistics of the Maypole, I made decorations, I wrote many of our invocations, I decided appropriate offerings and so forth. It was a TON of pre-work before ritual, but I was devoted, it was an Irish Beltaine and I truly wanted to do it. 

So for this week's assignment, I will not be writing about Spring Equinox, Instead I will be writing about Beltaine and my experiences during the ritual itself. 
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• High Day Celebrated: Beltaine
• Date Celebrated: April 26th 2015
• Who lead the Rite: Columbia Protogrove  members David and Amber (Myself!)
• Number of Attendees: 30-35
• Gatekeeper: Lugh
• Deities of the Occasion: Goddesses Danu, Columbia, Brigid, and Ainè, and the Gods Lugh, Manannan Mac Lir, Aengus Mac Og, and the Noble Ones, the Sidhe
• Omen Method: Tarot

Omens: 
The Ancestors: the Mirror-Moon
Nature Spirits: the Guardian- Devil
Gods and Goddess: the Stag- Strength

Leaving an overall feeling of emphasis on inner strength, reflection, and encouragement to walk each of our paths with honor and purpose and to not let the condescending voices of others, personal insecurity or negativity derail us from our intentions. Be strong, walk (or strut) you path; use the drive and momentum of Beltane at this time to fuel you for we have their support and encouragement.

This ritual was a challenge for me as I was on crutches and/or knee cart but it did not distract me from being fully involved in all aspects of this ritual. Being a ritual leader this time, I knew what to expect in terms of invocations and such (as I wrote them) but they really became something more powerful when I spoke my own words around so many people. My nervousness faded very quickly and I was able to truly enjoy the entire ritual. Offerings went very well and I felt that everyone felt welcome and among friends. I lead my first ever meditation in a group setting and I don't feel very confident that I did super well but I know that I will only get better. When I first heard the meditation to meet Aengus and Aine I asked our grove leader if I could read it instead of him so I had volunteered because I was moved by the message and story. I was happy to share that even if it felt a bit long winded but that could also be mostly insecurity talking. This was the first ritual with Columbia Protogrove in which we did our meditations with a singing bowl and it made such a HUGE difference in terms of focus and grounding. (Something I struggle with in a public ritual environment) I am a member of our newly formed Bardic group and this was the first organized Bard performance since we started having practices and I felt it went REALLY well. I absolutely love to sing and have been missing choir in my life so I am thrilled to have the opportunity to sing again with a group and help raise energy on high days like this. For the first time since Imbolc I did not make a new gown for the High Day, my handicap made sewing impossible so I wore a long pink renaissance gown that has significant meaning to me as my grandmother helped me sew it when I was younger. I did however, learn how to make a floral crown with fresh flowers for the first time! 
Although I could not participate myself due to my handicap, I watched my first Maypole dance in a public environment and it was the most amazing experience. I laughed so much because there was so much happiness and joy from everyone. What started as chaos developed into genuine merriment and it was such a warming feeling to me. Its one thing to be in the middle with all the ribbons trying to remember which way to weave and its totally something else to watch from the outside and let each smile, each child or adult's laugh collect in your heart. This is what fun is. Community fun. Happiness is an emotion I am sensitive too and It just resonated around the Maypole. If that pole could glow from all the laughter sent up those ribbons it would have been visible in space an beyond. 
As our Beltane honored the Sidhe I imagined them dancing with us around the maypole and delighting in our display. So many elements of this ritual clicked for me and reminded me that I do this because I love it, because it brings out the happiest part of me. The part that celebrates warmth and love and laughter and community.